In the past, burning Polaroids and other mementos associated with a prior relationship was a way of officially enacting closure and moving on. However, nowadays, in the age of the internet and digital storage, this process is not as straightforward. The sheer volume of digital material generated in 2018 was staggering – 33 trillion gigabytes! This number has since increased even more and continues to grow. In our current society, almost all of our experiences and events are documented and stored online in one form or another. Unfortunately, there is currently no guide on how to handle breakups while living in the digital age. In the past, if a person didn’t want to burn love letters, gifts, or photographs related to an ex, they’d throw them away or pack them up in the attic. Now, though, with social media and other online accounts, our memories remain online, ensuring reminders of former partners remain visible long after a splits. As communication researchers, we’ve been investigating how people make the decision to keep or discard things from old relationships, and how it impacts the ability to move on. We call it ‘relationship cleansing’. We are suggesting that people going through a break-up analyze three parts of their digital presence: items, narratives, and connections. They should then decide whether or not they wish to get rid of them. In relationships, a variety of digital items, like text messages and images, are created to portray and recall the relationship. These joyous photographs from anniversaries and holidays stay in web galleries even when the relationship is no longer in existence. Since much of this digital material is spread across different platforms and accounts, which people may not have access to, it is more likely to last. Old photos of memories can sometimes appear unexpectedly and make one think about their partner unexpectedly. Although you may have no control over this, you still can decide whether to keep or delete any memories that you have access to. Retaining these objects might help you to continue to think through the relationship, which could further your individual development. Perhaps if you delete traces of your ex partner, you can speed up the process of moving on and getting ready for the next relationship. You cannot control what people will think or say. It is essential that recent breakers-up reflect on not just physical matters like pictures and past conversations, but also how they will interpret and interpretate the breakup to themselves and others. The story they form of the broken connection can be a very powerful tool, aiding in how they recall their relationship.
